Living with Depression: The Suffocating Struggle

I didn’t wake up one day and realize I was depressed—it crept in slowly, like an unwanted shadow, taking over little by little. There was no single reason for it. Some days, I’d wake up and feel completely blank. Not sad, not happy, just... numb. I started losing interest in everything around me—the things that used to excite me, the people who used to make me laugh. Nothing felt worth it anymore.

At first, I didn’t even recognize it as depression. I thought I was just tired or going through a rough patch. But as the days went on, it became clear that something was wrong. I began to question myself constantly: Why do I feel like this? Why can’t I just be normal? I felt guilty for not being able to shake it off. Every time someone asked me how I was doing, I’d say, “I’m fine,” even though I wasn’t. I didn’t want anyone to know that I was falling apart inside.

The hardest part of depression for me wasn’t the sadness. It was the feeling of being stuck in a dark place with no way out. It was like I was watching the world from behind a glass wall—seeing everyone else move forward, laughing, living, while I just stood still. I felt like I was failing at life, like I couldn’t do the simplest things anymore.

It took a long time for me to reach out for help. I didn’t want to admit that I couldn’t handle it on my own. But eventually, the weight of it became too much to carry alone. I found someone to talk to, and they helped me understand that depression isn’t something you can just get over. It’s something you learn to manage, and it’s okay to need support.

I’m still learning to deal with it. Some days are good, some days are hard, and some days it feels like I’m back at square one. But I’ve learned to be patient with myself. I know now that there’s no shame in asking for help or taking a break. And sometimes, simply surviving the day is an accomplishment.

If you're reading this and struggling with depression, please know that you're not alone. It's okay to not have everything figured out. Take it one step at a time, and reach out when you need to. You deserve to feel better, and you deserve to be kind to yourself.